“Love is when you meet someone who tells you something new about yourself.”

10 Ways to Know Your Own Love Desires


Unless you have been living under a rock or are a hermit, you would have undoubtedly have heard of the Law Of Attraction. Simply put, it states that whatever happens in your life is a direct result of the thoughts in your head. So what does this mean for your love life? Obviously, if you have no idea about what you really want, it would be difficult to search for it or even recognize it. It might even be right under your nose, but you wouldn’t know because you have no idea what you want! So the first thing to get clear about is to understand your own love desires.

What do you want in a relationship? What are you looking for in a partner? What kind of activities would you enjoy doing with your partner? What do you expect out of life 5 years, 10 years, 20 years from now? What makes you truly happy? What turns you on? What makes you feel that a relationship is worth working on or fighting for?

While it may not be necessary to get a hold on answers for all these questions (and many more) it is certainly helpful to have a crystal clear vision of your own love desires if you want to take your dating life to the next level. Here are 10 ways to know your own love desires!

  1. Take an inventory of your past relationships. The ones that didn’t work and the ones that did work, but did not last because of external factors. Try to find any patterns in them. Was there anything in common among your exes that exasperated you or conversely, thrilled you? Getting to see your patterns help you identify what you truly want in love. This way, you can stay clear of the negative patterns in the future as you will be more conscious and aware of them the next time you are in a relationship. When you focus on what you want, the more the likelihood that it will increase in future.
  2. Go over your favorite romantic movies, novels, books, and look for patterns in what drew you to it. You will find clues to your love interests there.
  3. Understand your values, your deep-seated beliefs that have sprung from your childhood and upbringing, which are not likely to change. Knowing this will help you find someone who matches them. This is an important key to a successful relationship.
  4. Write down a list of qualities that you are ready to compromise on and a list of those that you cannot compromise on, no matter what.
  5. Understand that nobody is perfect, so figure out what is your priority when it comes to those qualities listed under non-negotiable.
  6. Be clear about the kind of relationship you are looking for – just casual fun or more serious commitment?
  7. Once you have found a partner, always keep the lines of communication open. Be willing to share your feelings and be respectful about your partner’s feelings as well.
  8. Be cognizant of changing needs. Revisit your list regularly and trim out the ones that you have outgrown.
  9. Visualize what you want and imagine it becoming a reality.
  10. Go within, take time to be still and get in touch with yourself.